Good Day

Well, it didn't start off so hot. Ryan got me out of bed at 7am ... and I proceeded to bundle up in several layers of clothing for an 8am soccer tournament. Once I was completely dressed and we had all the kids bundled ... we got a call that soccer was cancelled because of all the rain. DOH! I went back to bed. That was nice. But then we'll have to do it all again next weekend. Blech.

This afternoon we went to the pumpkin patch. The weather was perfect and the boys were all old enough to run around and enjoy it. No one was afraid of the animals or too scared to go down the slide .. or even need assistance on any of the playground stuff.

We chose to forgo the train ride this year, and instead took the hayride for the first time out to the pumpkin patch. (We normally just pick from the already picked pumpkins.) It was a nice ride and the pumpkin patch was so pretty ... bright pops of orange in a brown field.

We came home and had a really nice dinner .... then the boys helped "gut" their pumpkins, then drew on them and daddy and I carved them. They look great! Now we're just chillin'.

A perfect day...festive...and good family time. *sigh* See more pics on http://www.thegerdings.com/.

there's a new poll question!!

Too Many Spinning Plates.

1.  Producing shows AND doing my actual job.

2.  Finishing the re-done basement to get my scrap area functional - and the rest of the room in shape.

3.  Main computer is down at home.  BIG MESS.  BIG PAIN.  BIG ANNOYANCE.  BIG INCONVENIENCE.

4.  Planning KG Halloween party as head room mom and annoyed with other folks not just letting me be.

5.  Have renegotiated my contract.  But have not yet seen it.

6.  Keeping house.

7. Interacting w/kids. More than yelling at them to "JUST EAT" and "STOP THAT!" or "HURRY UP." And my all time favorite, laced with guilt  "NOT NOW!"

8.  Garage.  Cleaned it organized it then ruined it w/stuff from basement room for re-do.

9.  Not getting good sleep.

10.  Trying to get a cold.  Managed to avoid Kyle's strep.

11.  Wish I had time to go get some pumpkins and pretty mums to put on the front porch area.

So, I really want to just curl up in my bed and sleep -- for a loooong time.  And then have a day to myself to catch up.  

What a bunch of whining.

Busy

Funny, I'm too busy hovering over kids to read the book about how to not hover over your kids. heh heh.

I thought I drop a fast blog .. but I keep getting distracted by yo-gabba-gabba on Nick Jr. Ever seen that show? It's so weird it's fascinating. And the kids actually DO get up and do whatever they're doing. Then I have "Wiggle wiggle wiggle Jump ... hooooold stiiiiilllll .... wiggle wiggle wiggle jump" stuck in my head all day.

I'm getting out Halloween decorations. Did one bin yesterday. Doing another bin today. Kinda hard to do since the basement's so messed up right now as we prepare for a "re-do". I have GOT to get painting and get that out of the way.

Ok .. back to the bins. Happy Friday!!!!

Kids: Social Achievement

Interesting thoughts from first part of Chapter 1 in "A Nation of Wimps."

• It used to be that kids got their social status from their parents. Now parents get THEIR social status from kids!

• Parents these days don't feel comfortable leaving their children with someone else for 2 hours. TWO HOURS! It talks about how if the child isn't in the mother's laser sights for every second ... they believe they will somehow be psychologically damaged among other things.

INTERESTING~! Ever felt like you needed to take your kids to gymboree cuz that's what everyone else does? Or you need to be seen at the soccer field? I don't think I've gotten quite sucked into that ... yet. BUT --

I do know I've worried about my kids with other people. I HATE when they come home from somewhere and their manners or behaviors are all out of whack. (Saying things like "whatever" or "gimme that" or talking with their mouth full because the ADULTS they were with don't set good examples or have ANY boundaries.) But at the same time, I do understand that we NEED a break from each other. It's best for everyone.

The book talks about how much kids need normal every day PLAY ... but parents are always interfering. I'm getting better about that. Just go outside. Our backyard is fenced in .. I don't need to be hovering over them. And Jack and Kyle are allowed to go to other houses .. Jack is supposed to be watching out for Kyle. I just need to turn off the TV/Computer more, I think.

So ... so far so good. I just need to continue to reinforce what Daddy and I consider acceptable manners/behavior so that when they do go elsewhere - they can withstand bad examples and just know better.

A Nation of Wimps

That's the name of a book I'm reading now. It totally goes along with something I've been meaning to blog (bitch about) for a long time now.

I have really noticed, in my work, and some social situations a HUGE problem with the new generation of young people. Pure ENTITLEMENT. They think they should be hired for the big shows ... right out of school .... and get all the perks of a more senior employee. They think they can take time off to get their teeth whitened .. or because their boyfriend is SAD. They've never had anyone tell them they've done something wrong, so when you try to point out errors and poor performance, they simply don't know how to handle it - and worse yet, don't have the common sense to know to shape up fast, or they'll be fired. There's no fear. They don't think they should have to work the crappy hours or extra days to move ahead. They don't want to put in extra time to move ahead. They want it all served up on a silver platter. It's driving me crazy.

And you know who the problem is? Parents. Specifically these parents who fall under this term I love: helicopter parents. You know, they hover over every thing a child does. What's worse, they not only hover, but they remove all obstacles, sources of "pain" and chances to learn about LIFE. They "interfere" in ways my generation and older would be MORTIFIED about .. like calling bosses and college professors. I had a parent email me to ask me to approve her child's -- my employee's -- vacation time. Now, I was talking to some recent grads who tell me I shouldn't hold it against the employee, because often when parents do this -- the student/employee has no idea it's happening. I'll give them that. Still, come on!

Ok. Here's the kicker. The big wham-o. The irony. The disappointing truth. I find myself doing it. I'm part of the problem!! I don't think I'm as "crazy" as many (most) parents worrying about every little thing and wanting to do everything for them. But I do have in my head things that "hurt" me in whatever way growing up, and try to prevent that.

Were we all raised so HORRIBLY that we've got to change EVERYTHING in how we parent to not repeat the same mistakes?? I think now, in comparison, the answer is no - because I am so much better at handling "life" than these younger folks. But of course, as we parent, we must think "yes." I will never yell at my children in public, or fight with my husband in public, and I don't ever want my kids to feel "inferior" because they don't have the right clothes, toys or activities. Yikes! So I give them everything ... and they don't appreciate it. Bad move that's hard to fix.

Anyway ... this book nails it. It talks about how we do so much to protect our kids now that they become psychologically fragile. They don't know how to deal with disappointment or hurt - because they've never been able to learn to cope on their own. YES!

They NEED to fight with other kids. They NEED to lose a game and not get a trophy. They NEED to get a bad grade. They NEED to be told: you're not doing a good job. (God forbid!) How else will they get that "feeling" that helps them -- pushes them - to want to do better next time? (I can't help but wonder what the future of sports will be like with all these kids who can't get hurt...!)

The book has statistics on the skyrocketing number of college students who are binge drinking and needing counseling at school because they can't cope. And this whole "self mutilation" thing that's growing among kids is part of THIS problem.

So, I've just read the introduction so far. I'm really hoping I can get some guidance as to help my kids be STRONG ... INDEPENDENT and understand the concept of WORKING HARD -- ON YOUR OWN....being a SELF-STARTER. And how I can land the helicopter and let them fly on their own.

I'll keep you posted.